Shit is Bananas

I was trying to figure out exactly why my minifeed was so nauseating this Valentine's Day, compared to years past. Seemingly normal people totally lost their sense of normalcy yesterday with vomit-inducing statuses and mobile uploaded flowers/chocolate pics. I think its due, in large part, to the prevelance of mobile uploads. Everyone and their grandma has a smart phone and knows how to upload pics easily. (Well, maybe thats just my grandma, but she's ballin all over fb).

Mobile Uploads I Never Want To See:
- Your flowers. They're not special, as you can tell, 75% of the facebook population got some.
- Worse, a close up of the card and personal message that came with the flowers. Really?!
- You and your new fiance, showing off your engagement ring in front of a Christmas Tree. Twas a seriously cliche time to propose.
- 15 different pictures of your dog in various sleeping positions
- Your MySpace pics.

Mobile Uploads I Appreciate:
- An up-close picture of your engagement ring on your hand. Even a follow up pic or two from different angles. I gots to know why you said yes so young.
- 1 or 2 pics of your pup. I do want to see your dog, just not a daily update of them cuddling on the couch.

And just to show you I'm not a cranky love-hating cynic, I'm posting some REAL statuses I saw yesterday (grammar and punctuation copied exactly)...

"<3 Happy Valentines Day <3 happily lovin the cutest boy I know <3"

"baby you my everything, you all I ever wanted.. I love you. Happy valentines day."

"OMG. I  <3 VALENTINES DAY"

"Happy valentines day people! Mine was great :) "

"I hope everyone had a great day...my day sucked! i dont feel special at all :`-( i hope your boyfriends/girlfriends or husbands/wives showed you how special u are today"

"valentine's dinner with my FIRST and last valentine, [name redacted for privacy, hehe] :) <3"

"guys with gfs shuld just put their nuts in a jar and give that as their present... soo pathetic"

"girl next to me on the treadmill got flowers delivered to her mid-workout... like seriously?"

"i love love :) happy valentines day"

"KPMG stole my boyfriend. Celebrating with a heart shaped pizza from Papa John's"

"I have heartburn on valentines day. Ironic."